Reflection is important and is beneficial. It doesn’t need to just happen at the end of the year or on a birthday. Regularly checking in with yourself allows you to make sure you are still aligned with your goals and what you are doing in your life.
When you reflect it gives you a chance to look at what you have learned, your achievements and what you would like to achieve in the future. As my life is a lot different now after my work accident and being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. I have been forced to do a lot of self-reflection.
Here are 31 things I have learned in 31 years:
Photo by Eugene Zhyvchik on Unsplash
1. I am stronger than I thought
I never used to consider myself a strong person however, when I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and having to deal with chronic pain daily from my accident, I realised it takes huge strength to live every day in pain.
2. I do not need toxic relationships
Toxic relationships whether that is a friendship or a relationship with a partner, can be hugely detrimental to your mental health. It is important that you notice the toxic relationships and put yourself first.
3. Self-care is important
Self-care is not just about taking time to pamper yourself, but make the hard decisions etc. Learning to make your needs a priority.
4. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health
Your mental health can impact your physical health. It is vital you make time to look after your mental health. Journaling is something that works well!
5. Always attend your smear test appointments
They are so important and can save your life! Never feel embarrassed the nurses have seen it all before!
6. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness
This was a hard one to learn especially when I started needing help after my work accident and being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. I sometimes have to remind myself that it is okay for to ask for help.
7. Your health is a valuable asset
I have learned this the hard way unfortunately because of my accident and being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and now this really impacts my health. So now, my health comes first!
8. To be aware of my impact on the environment
The environment is really effected by plastic pollution so much waste that we all need to start making small changes to help save the planet. I have been really trying and will continue to find eco-friendly swaps and ways I can be more sustainable.
9. Always wear sun cream
Sunscreen is vital in protecting your skin from sun damage.
10. Maintaining friendships and making new friends takes effort
As you grow, life takes you and your friends in all different directions, because of this, you both have to make extra effort to keep those friendships going. I have some really strong friendships that I have had since I was a toddler and primary school age and it because we show each other respect and make the effort to stay in one another’s lives.
Photo by Joel Muniz on Unsplash
11. Find a creative outlet
Creativity has so many benefits on your physical and mental health. You do not need to be able to draw to be creative. There are so many creative activities that you can try.
12. I am my own best advocate
You have to learn to speak and stand up for yourself.
13. Surround yourself with good and positive people
Who you surround yourself with cannot only impact your mental health but how you feel about yourself. Having good positive people around you can motivate and empower you to be the best version of you. I have a hugely supportive family, partner and friends and this allows me to be confident in my abilities.
14. If I have to keep chasing people to be in my life, then it is probably time to let go
I have done so much chasing in the past. This is something I do not anymore. Time is so precious and I only want to spend it with people who are making the effort with me also.
15. Who you follow or be-friend on social media can hugely impact you
Who I follow can either motivate me or make me feel negatively. Make sure you choose who is on your timeline.
16. Not every relationship including friendships are meant to last forever. And that is okay.
Every friendship and relationship will teach you something or you will learn something about yourself.
17. If you unhappy in a job, a relationship or my body. You have the power to change that.
I am in charge of my own happiness and I have the power to change something if I am unhappy. So do you!
18. Comparing yourself to others only makes you unhappy
I have done this and sometimes I can easily fall back into this bad habit – all it does is make you feel sad. I try and remind myself that we are all on our own individual journey. Remember do not compare your beginning to someone’s ending.
19. Always remember that you are somebody’s inspiration
Like how you may look at someone on social media or a celebrity and admire them or they inspire you. There is someone who looks at you like that.
20. Do one thing everyday day that makes you happy
Even if it is something as small as putting on your favourite top. Make sure you smile everyday.
Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash
21. Be comfortable spending time alone
Whether it is for a short time or not, you need to feel content in your own company.
22. Take time when making big purchases
I use to spend money without much thinking. However, now I realise big purchases require a bit of thinking. This has allowed me to save a lot of money.
23. You don’t need to spend money to have fun
You can find so much fun in the little things that do not requite money and you learn to appreciate those little things much more.
24. You will learn a lot about yourself when you step out of your comfort zone and push yourself.
I can get so anxious when I step out of my comfort zone. However, I have a lot of upcoming activities that are completely out of my comfort zone and would avoid. I am hoping these will increase my confidence.
25. Invest in things that will last
This is a lesson that makes a lot of sense. You spend a lot of time on your feet and in your bed asleep. Therefore spending that little bit more on things like shoes and your bed/mattress is going to help you and your health.
26. Hold your loved ones close and tell them you love them and how much they mean to you all the time.
Life can be short, it is important to tell and show your loved ones how much you love and care about them everyday.
27. It is important to invest in yourself
Investing in yourself – whether it is improving your health, your personal growth or development, to improve your life, happiness or success. You have that power to grow! Investing in yourself is the best investment you will make!
28. Always set yourself goals to work towards
It is vital to continuously set goals for you to work towards, to motivate you and to grow your success. Otherwise what are you doing in your life?
29. Be present. Always.
Like I said previously life can be short and so when you are spending time with your loved ones, be present. Put your phone down, put all work aside and enjoy your time together.
30. Don’t be hard on yourself
This is something I have learned affects my mental health. I can be really tough on myself especially if I am having a really bad day with my pain or fatigue. This is something I am continuing to work on.
31. Don’t speak or act when you are angry or emotional
You can say something or do something you may come to regret. Take time to calm down before you make any comment or action.
These are just some of the things I have learned over 31 years. I have certainly learned a lot about myself and life from having a chronic illness. As I get older I am sure life will teach me many more things.
What is one thing you have learned? Can you relate to anything I have learned from? I’d love to hear in the comments.
Amazing things, these are important things in our life and we need to pay attention for them. Thank you for sharing!
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These are really awesome!
These are good life lessons. We learned so many things as we age and realise that’s there’s nothing wrong with us.
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Aside from #5, I would certainly agree with all points. I am much older than 31 and have learned a lot over the years both from advice and learning the hard way (doing). That said, I honestly don’t know what else I would add other than “have conversations with elders”. They know still more… anyhow, I enjoyed the post.
That’s a great tip! Thank you for reading and commenting!
I relate to lots of these Lauren! Particularly that some friendships aren’t meant to last forever and you can only try so hard with certain people x
Definitely! Thank you for reading and commenting.
I feel connected to a lot of what you shared here too; there are so many things we learn as we journey through life and I look forward to the new things I will experience, etc. I think taking care of our health is the biggest thing I’ve learned over the decades I’ve been here. It’s vital we have access to care and not having that is detrimental (found that out where I live with no insurance until recently). Great post — you’ve really got me thinking!
Oh gosh! I hope you are okay. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Ooh I love this, I relate to so many of these! I think a really big one for me is to not act when I’m emotional or angry, you truly do just end up regretting it. I really need to work on being more comfortable spending time alone though! Thank you so much for sharing x
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Thank you for sharing these amazing lessons. We agree that health is one of the most valuable assets you can have. It enables you to do and enjoy everything else. We would go further to say that the ability to learn and grow is another valuable lesson. Don’t forget to return the comments on our most recent posts!
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You’re welcome.
Great insights! There is always something to learn for sure. Life is a constant state of learning for sure. I enjoyed reading. 😊
Pastor Natalie (ExamineThisMoment)
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happy 31st birthday, lauren! these are really great insights you had for 31 years. thanks for sharing these.
It was my birthday a while ago, I just decided to share what I have learned. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Love all these lessons you’ve learned. I agree, reflection is definitely beneficial and needed, I find particularly at those “milestone” moments, like birthdays and new years. I’m with you on the smear tests. I’m 30 this year and have more smears than normal – and colposcopies – due to HPV and I’m always advocating for people to go to theirs!
That is great you regularly go to your smears. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Great lessons and insights. I’ve found in my 30s these things are much easier to live by…I sometimes wish I’d managed them in my 20s, we keep learning
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am definitely learning more about life in my 30s.
My 30s are a bit more peaceful and comfortable 😂
I completely agree with all of them. The past couple years, I’ve really had to learn to prioritize my mental health more. It’s not easy but very necessary.
Definitely necessary. Thank you for reading and commenting.
All of these are totally related especially about mental health. It’s is so important. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for reading and commenting. If you have a blog can you leave it so I can give it a read.
A great list of things to learn! 🙂
These are all great lessons you’ve learned and I can definitely relate to many of these especially that not every relatinship is meant to last forever.
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I absolutely loved this post Lauren! I loved reading about the 31 things you have learned in 31 years, some of these things I’ve definitely learned through my 29 years! x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
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Such a wonderful introspective post Lauren. I would agree with all of these things for myself as well. A big one for me is that sometimes I’m not strong enough to support and others at the same time. I need to take care of myself first.
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Yass girl!!! Totally agree! Firstly, though, there is NO WAY you’re 31! You certainly don’t look it. Secondly, I’ve written something similar for my 30th, and it’s amazing what you’ve learned about yourself and the world around you when you stop to think about it.
I am 31 and will be 32 in February. That is really kind of you to say! Thank you for reading and commenting.
Awesome list! This is so true! Thank you 😊
I can relate to all of these. I’ve definitely learnt that it is best to walk away from relationships that are constantly making you unhappy. Thank you for sharing these.
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I can relate to a lot of this. Great post
Yes to every single point here! Surrounding yourself around supportive people, understanding that not all relationships are meant to last, and focusing on your happiness is so important. When you learn these lessons, you begin to see life in a completely different way. Thank you for sharing!
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I can totally relate to all of this because I experienced it all in my 20s 🙂 I like to surround myself with positive and supportive people and focusing on self care is very important. Thanks for sharing, Lauren x
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This is a wonderful list! I agree with all of it, especially telling people you love them and care about them. That is so important to do before it is too late. I recently lost a very close cousin and I wish I had told her how much she meant to me more often. Lovely post!
Sorry for your loss! I hope you are okay. Thank you for reading and commenting. Can you link your blog so I can read? X
Fabulous points! Definitely do something positive each day. Happy belated birthday. 🥳
Thank you. My birthday was in February. Just have to reflect regularly not just for milestones. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I keep seeing Bournemouth on the telly. Beaches look amazing! Lucky you to live there.
It is beautiful. I love living here x
I relate to so many of these things, and I am still learning a few in my twenties. Number 4 is an important lesson I am still working on, but I have recently improved at taking care of my mental health.
Completely agree with number 10, as they do take a bit more effort as everyone is going in different directions. Yes, to number 17 as well, which is something I continue to learn, and I could do with doing number 20 more.
Thank you for sharing these fantastic lessons. 😊
So glad you were able to relate to this post. Thank you for reading and commenting.
It’s amazing what life teaches us, and even as we get older, we still learn new things about ourselves daily. I can relate to a lot of these, especially being stronger than I thought possible. Also investing in things that last, I never cared when I was a teen but as I approach 30, I’d much rather save for something that will do me for many years rather than something that just looks pretty.
Definitely purchasing a little more expensive and better quality saves you money. Thank you for reading and commenting.
‘If I have to keep chasing people to be in my life, then it is probably time to let go’
This one hit me, I am also 31 years and have had to re-evaluate a lot of things in my life also…
Power to you and to this blog post!
Joseph
Thank you for reading and commenting! Life teaches us so much everyday!
I definitely found myself relating and connecting to a lot of the points you’ve made here, one after the other. I agree strongly on the points you’ve made about being an advocate for yourself and not being hard on yourself. There’s just so much here I feel strongly about. Beautiful post, Lauren.
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For sure, mental health is as important as physical health. For me, a lot of my health issues wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for my mental health conditions. My reckless disregard for life because of BPD and chronic depression led to me doing a lot of dumb things that I’m now paying the price for
I am sorry to hear you have health issues. Mental health is vital. Thank you for reading and commenting.
This is a FANTASTIC list and you’ve outlined some really incredible life lessons! I resonated with the relationships and friendships ones as you mentioned those take work, and not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. Thanks for sharing this wonderful list 🙂
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