Journaling is something that I hugely advocate for positive mental health and for an effective form of self-care. It can be a very therapeutic process.
There are so many different forms of journaling to suit your style or what you want to get out of the process. So trialling eye-opening and you could really find a style that you really enjoy.
For the longest time I have always kept a diary even when I was young. It is good to be able to look back on positive times or show what you have overcome.
Gratitude is something that is super important to practise and have in your life. It allows you to focus on the good things whether it is something big or small. However, not everything is a bed of roses a 100% of the time – and that is absolutely okay! It is vital that you recognise that not everything is great all of the time, so if you are more of a pessimist, allow me to introduce you to ingratitude journaling. As this may be the go-to style for you.
It is so important that you acknowledge the harder and difficult times as well as the enjoyable times. If you don’t listen to those hard times and keep those thoughts and feelings bottled up, it is a fact that it can be harmful to your health and nervous system. It can come out in your bodies like: tension headaches or anxious and butterfly stomach. You should never put on a brave face to stay positive, you should be authentic and not practise that toxic positivity behaviours.
Photo by Team Fredi on Unsplash
Emotions are about our minds and our bodies communicating something that is either right or wrong. Those feelings can give you guidance, peace or warning you of something that doesn’t level with your core values. Some emotions may be uncomfortable but learn to sit with them and reflect on why you are feeling that way. Ingratitude journaling can be a great opportunity to practise self-discovery and develop your self-awareness.
Here is how ingratitude journaling works:
Step One
Find yourself a quiet and comfortable space where you can fully immerse yourself in the process.
Step Two
Pick a journal or a notebook that you love and grab a pen. You should journal with handwritten notes as apposed to typing your thoughts. By handwriting in your journal allows your thoughts to slowed down to the pace of the pen gliding the paper. This can have a real calming influence.
Step Three
Write down a list of all your concerns, things that have wrong, what situations that have left you disappointed, when you have felt cheated, upset or even hard done by. Even if you feel they are small or petty thoughts, write them down and acknowledge that they caused you to feel a negative way.
Photo by Sixteen Miles Out on Unsplash
Step Four
Read and reflect on your list of situations and experiences you have written. Then separate each of your situations into two lists, one being what you can control and the second being what you cannot control.
Step Five
This step is all about reflection You can think about tangible changes that you can make to those situations and feelings you have control over.
The whole ingratitude process is not about being super negative it is about balance. It gives you the chance to be honest about your feelings to improve your mental health development.
Using this journaling style is about being truly honest with yourself about your feelings ands emotions. It is not you being negative or selfish, you are just being more self-aware. This type of journaling will give you direction and give you the opportunity to focus on things you can change.
You are able to explore who you are and have a deeper understanding of your behaviours. You will learn to find a way to live with things that you have no control over.
Here are some prompts for both sides of your list:
For the list of things you can control:
- What is your motivator for making those changes?
- Are you wanting to make the changes for yourself or others?
- In years from now, do you think you would regret not making those changes?
- How are you going to make the changes?
For the list of things you cannot control:
- What is stopping you from moving on from those feelings or situations?
- What can you do to allow yourself to heal or grieve what you have lost?
- This process of working through this may require some extra support from your loved ones.
- What do you think is stopping you from letting go of those emotions?
It definitely isn’t the go-to journal practice, but it can be quite soothing for your soul to release those negative and restricting emotions.
Have you ever tried ingratitude journaling before? Is this a style of journaling you would be open to trying? I’d love to hear in the comments.
i really really enjoyed this blog post, i definitely am going to start up journaling again as my heart just wasnt in it last time i tried! thank you for the brill post- keep it up!!
Thank you for reading and commenting.
First of all, I love thew new logo, girl. Your blog is one of the best ones to talk about journaling and self-improvement, believe me! I also love the journaling prompts about the things you can and cannot control. Each question is eye-opening.
lifebeginsattwenty.com
I am glad you have enjoyed this post and find my blog so beneficial. Thank you so much for your kind comments.
I have never done this, but I can see how it would be therapeutic. I especially like step 4 because it’s so important to understand what you can and can’t control.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you found it helpful.
I like this idea! Writing down concerns, worries and situations that didn’t work out is a great sense of release and closure! x
Lucy | http://www.lucymary.co.uk
I am so glad you like this idea. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Great tips, At first, I didn’t believe that it can help us, but when I started doing it. I can feel the impact it do and since then I love doing it.
I am so glad you found it helpful thank you for reading and commenting.
This is a great idea!! I definitely have sat down and written imaginary letters to people to get out my anger or frustration and then never sent them and I found that was helpful. Sometimes, you really need to write it all out, be petty, whine, and just let your emotions out. So you can process through things and also work through difficult emotions. Thanks for sharing!!
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you found this blog post useful and helpful.
I hadn’t heard about ingratitude journalling but I can see why this would be a really powerful tool as by following the steps you can work through the emotions being felt as well as considering the situation. By deconstructing it, you can look to how to deal with the emotions and work with the aspects you have control over.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you have found out something new!
Journaling is so helpful and these are some great prompts. We’re going to give them a try.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I hope it helps you!
I imagine this is a great way of processing thoughts and emotions – fab idea thanks for sharing
I am glad you found this post helpful. Thank you for reading and commenting.
We really like the prompts you provided. They’re great for helping make sense of emotions.
Thank you for reading and commenting.
What a wonderful journalling method, Lauren! I kinda do a version of this through my morning pages, since they’re all about me whining on paper. But it does crystalise my thoughts, allowing me to see my negative thoughts in my head, instead of them bouncing around in my mind and me not being able to ‘catch’ them, so to speak. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for reading and commenting your experience.
This sounds like a great way to journal. I am going to try it out. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for reading and commenting.
This is very interesting and completely not what I expected at all! I’ve heard of gratitude journalling but never this. Maybe I’ll give this a go sometime and see what I can get out of it for myself! Thank you!
I am glad you found it an interesting concept. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I love the idea of an ingratitude journal, I think that best suits mine and my partner’s pessimistic view of the world ha ha ha. I may have to research this one to see if it’s been tested or not, because I’ve never heard of such a journal idea before
I hope it helps you! Thank you for reading and commenting.
I’ve not thought about doing it this way around, but I can definitely see how it helps. You’re so right about the physically writing it down thing rather than typing. Thanks for sharing this. I think the what you can / can’t control sections are super important. We so often worry about things we can’t control.
Claire.X
http://www.clairemac.co.uk
Definitely. It can really help. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I love the idea of focusing on things we can control and questioning our thoughts and feelings.
That’s great you enjoyed this post. Thank you for reading and commenting.
The question prompts are great to allow you to stop and rethink your thoughts / actions. It’s great to take stock and reassess.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you enjoyed the post.
What a great idea! Although it’s good to be aware of things that you’re grateful for, I think focusing on what things you can improve is and what things you need to learn to accept sometimes much more important. This might be a style for me sometimes.
I am glad you found it really interesting. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Great technique! I believe in embracing negative events and not pushing them to one side but thinking about and learning from them.
It is definitely uncomfortable to sit with those feelings but can benefit us all in the long-term. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Really interesting post. I recently started journalling and love the outcome it has given me, allowing me a free space to talk over my stuff with me. It has definitely helped my mental health. I love the idea of ingratitude journaling, as I often feel pressured to see the good side to everything, but balance is key, we are not happy all the time and that, as you say, is ok.
I am glad journalling has been helpful for you. I am glad you found this post interesting. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I really enjoyed this post. I love this idea. I’ve never done it in a journal before but I have done a list when I was in therapy the first time. I think it’s always good to acknowledge your negative thoughts and feelings in order to understand them, why they’re happening and what to do when they occur again. Thank you so much for sharing!
I am glad you really enjoyed this post. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I haven’t heard of ingratitude journaling before, but I could see how it would be a beneficial process. Thanks so much for sharing all about it
It can be so helpful. Thank you for reading and commenting.
This is such an interesting idea about journaling. I always focused on the positive and gratitude rather than the opposite. I will look into trying this – thank you!
xo Olivia | http://www.oliviaandbeauty.com
I hope it is beneficial for you. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I’ve never heard of ingratitude journalling before, what a wonderful post explaining what it’s all about, Lauren. I particularly like your point about separating things into what you can and can’t control, that’s really helpful. x
I am glad you found it helpful. I have found it incredibly helpful. Thank you for reading and commenting Lisa x
We are both light and dark. Sometimes sitting with our darkness and feeling our feelings it is the best way to let them go. GREAT post! ✌️
Thank you for reading and commenting. I am glad you can relate. Can you link your blog?
I haven’t heard about ingratitude journal before but I’m sure this can improve my mental health. I want to try this and have a deeper understanding of myself, especially some things that I can’t control 😀 Thanks for sharing, Lauren x
I hope this helps you. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I have never tried ingratitude journaling before but it is something I definitely would like to try. There’s some tempting I haven’t fully dealt with and I keep ignoring them. This is very helpful x
Jeannie M
I hope if you do try this style of journaling that it is beneficial for you. Thank you for reading and commenting.
I haven’t heard of ingratitude journaling, but I have done something like this before. When I found out that someone I knew did something horrible & is currently sitting in jail for it, I didn’t how to process it so I started writing. It did help me realize that I had no control over the situation, but I can control how I feel.
Oh gosh, what a horrible situation to be in. It is great that writing helped you through those feelings. Thank you for reading and sharing your experience.
I’ve never heard of this type of journaling before although I did used to do something similar when I did end of the month releasing rituals, by writing down all the negative things from the previous month, reflecting on them, then burning them and letting them go. Which is a helpful exercise but I think this ingratitude journaling is MUCH better, where you can actually sit down and give yourself some solid advice at the end of it. I love the aspect of splitting them into two columns of what you can/can’t control.
I am so glad you found this post and style interesting. Reflection is so important. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Fantastic post! It’s really interesting to think about how negativity can actually help your mental health. Thank you for sharing x
It is a great way to journal. Thank you for reading and commenting. X
Very interesting. I can’t see doing ingratitude journaling myself but I can see it being helpful for some. Thanks for sharing,
It isn’t for everyone. Thank you for reading and commenting Mark.
This is a really interesting exercise. I have enjoyed doing gratitude journaling in the past but never considered spinning it in this way. I’m going to have to give this a try.
Thank you for reading and commenting. I will be interested to hear about how you got on. Can you link your blog also?
I really enjoyed reading about this! I’ve never heard of journaling this way but it makes so much sense to me. I also like the idea of breaking the larger list down into smaller ones. I recently bought a journal and have yet to use it. Now I know what I’m going to do with it. Thanks for sharing this helpful information! I shared so others can read, too.
I am so glad you found this post enjoyable. Thank you for reading and commenting.
The nuance about writing with a pen and a paper is a really nice take away for me. When I started writing with a pen and paper, I ended up scribbling most times and I couldn’t understand what I had written. I blamed it on the bad handwriting that I’ve always had. Most times it’ll be because I’m trying to catch with my mind’s pace. So I like typing. Thanks for the tip. Really nice post!
Thank you for reading and commenting.
Journaling is something I used to be so big on, I keep all my journals. Lately I’ve been dealing with past relationship trauma and I am going to use this method to try and move past some of it. I might even dust off my blog and publish some of them. Thanks for the advise!
I hope it helps you! Thank you for reading and commenting.
Yes I tried this kind of journaling before it helps in purging negative thoughts. I think following your steps is more appropriate can’t wait to start again…
I hope these steps help you. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Nice going! Come across of this post and cease what I’m doing for a moment. I have kept journal also since I was a 14 – year old child and it has become my saving grace in times of every situation be it chaotic, or successful. I write what my mind and heart tell me, and do not stall on one emotion. Journaling has enabled me to spurn distraction, helped more to set sail once more towards my coveted goal. Thanks again!